A Swarkley Valentine's Day
by how-i-met-my-otp
Summary: Okay okay, I know it isn't Valentine's Day. I wrote this ages ago and haven't gotten around to posting to here. Still, swarkles is bound to be full of feels no matter the time of year, right?


Barney sat at the usual booth, throwing back the last of his scotch and stealing too many glances at Robin, who was standing at the bar, casually talking to some guy she'd just met. He hated watching other people hit on her, even though he knew nothing she'd ever have with them would mean anything, he felt the paining stabs of jealousy all too often.

And he couldn't blame them. Robin was hot. More than hot. Anyone who didn't hit on her probably needed an intervention. But it still hurt, even though she wasn't his. In fact it was that she wasn't his that hurt the most.

And nothing had changed. Not really. He still didn't want a serious relationship, and he wasn't ready to be someone's boyfriend. But it was Valentine's Day, and although he and Robin weren't remotely together, he couldn't help feeling wrong about not at least saying something.

As if on cue, Robin sat down across from him. "When did dudes become such chicks?" She said rolling her eyes, "I swear Valentine's Day is just a day when everyone turns into Ted. _That_ guy was all like 'aww so romantic that I met a pretty girl on Valentine's Day we should get coffee.'" She imitated him in a voice that largely resembled that of Robin Sparkles, minus the accent.

He half-laughed in response, as he often did when Robin did/said anything. She put up a tough exterior, but he always thought she managed to be hilarious and adorable despite it. "So, I assume you don't have any Valentine's Day plans either?"

"Nah, besides Valentine's Day is over-rated. I don't see the point of going out of my way to get a date."

"I doubt you'd have to go out of your way."

She shrugged in agreement. "I guess I'd rather hang out with a friend. I mean, I bet Valentine's Day sex is great, but some sappy guy telling me he loves me? I'll pass."

Barney looked down, some of the light escaping from his eyes. In the last couple of months, he had changed. He knew he loved Robin, despite how desperately he tried not to. It was difficult to admit it to himself, but even more difficult knowing that she didn't feel the same way, that she never would. He secretly longed for her to look back at him with a look in her eye that matched his own.

And of course, he admired her for her independence. It was one of the things he loved most about her. He didn't want her to need him, he only wanted her to want him. But she would never see him as more than a womanizing, lying commitment-phobe, with nothing more than tricks up his sleeves and a long string of meaningless, one-night stands because of it.

"That's _exactly_ how I feel." He replied, not totally lying. He did want to hang out with a friend, and she was the best one he had. And he knew from experience how great Valentine's Day sex was. He also thought that he could do without a sappy guy telling him that he loves him.

Robin, on the other hand, though she didn't need to hear that to know how he felt. He was Barney Stinson, living for sex and uncaring for love and relationships and Valentine's Day. She threw him a smile, telling him she'll get the next round.

It had been almost a year since their Robin-Sparkles-induced hook-up. Robin forced herself never to talk about it or go back for more despite how tempting it often was. Hidden away, deep inside her were feelings she constantly tried not to feel. She was confused, half-knowing she wanted him but not understanding the full extent of her desire. But it was Valentine's Day, and something about the day made ignoring the chemistry they both knew was there feel wrong.

She hated that the idea of Valentine's Day had so much influence over her thoughts, and so did he. Both spent the evening struggling with the things they wanted so desperately to say but were not yet ready to. The day slipped away like so many others, in the end, meaning nothing more than any other night the two of them spent at the bar.

…

Barney looked back on that day, straightening his tie for the hundredth time. In under an hour he and Robin would be married. Remembering the sheer agony of the days he let go by without being able to say "I love you" to her, and even worse, the days he let go by without talking to her at all somehow pushed away all of the fear that had been gnawing on him the night before.

Robin took a deep breath, preparing herself for what was to come next. She was beyond nervous, but thanks to Ted, was reassured that the choice she was about to make was the right one. There had been too many days where she had been alone, unknowing of how much happier she'd be with him. Times when she was too afraid to admit her feelings to herself, let alone the one she had feelings for. But all that had changed. She was finally being honest with herself.

And they both knew that the next Valentine's Day would be different.


End file.
